Modeling your behavior after your kids

What are you up to these days? Is it something you'd want your kids doing? Is it healthy? Because, if not, maybe it's not such a good idea for you either. Seriously, folks, aside from example, if there are things you're doing that you wouldn't dream of letting your kids do, where is your head at?

Now, I realize, obviously, parents have sex. Otherwise, you wouldn't be a parent, now would you? You don't want your kids having sex too young. That's not what I'm speaking of. And yes, parents might have an alcoholic drink occasionally.

Still, have you ever asked yourself, “If I know the reasons I don't want my kids partying all night, being irresponsible with their money, throwing temper tantrums or cursing like a sailor, why do I feel it's OK for me?”

I feel so much better when I take my own advice, don't you?

And isn't that a great way to discipline yourself? By thinking about whether your behavior is something you would condone from your children, or in my case, grandchildren? Also, if we insert example back into the equation, how can you live with such a double standard?

You do know that kids emulate their parents, yes? In fact, I believe that I read somewhere that children learn more through example than they do through disciplinary measures, restrictions or those heart to heart talks many parents engage in.

Ya, I don't get it. When I told my kids at a young age they shouldn't drink to excess, smoke, party like it's 1999, etc. I had my own behavior to back it up. They saw that I practiced what I preached.

Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect, you guys. For example, there was a brief time period once my kids grew up where I slipped up a bit, possibly chasing after my lost youth. It was over quite quickly once I realized my error. It happens to the best of us. I get that.

When I was raising them, though, it just didn't feel right or make sense to tell them not to do things because they were bad for them if I was doing those same things myself.

Plus, we should be as kind to ourselves as we are to our kids. If it's not good for them, it's not good for us either, you know?

So there you go. Be nice to yourself. Care as much about how your life turns out as you do how your kids' lives turn out. You don't have to be perfect but why not address your behavior just as you would your childrens' behavior? Why have a double standard for them to question?

And yes, we are all different. I get that for some people, the behaviors I mentioned might be acceptable. Still, whatever your values are, don't just insist that your kids live by them. Live by them yourself. I guarantee your life will be better.

PS - Have a little kid fun, too. Jump some rope. Play some games with the kids. It's just as good for you as it is for them!